In my last post, I mentioned how struck I was when Jodie Foster mentioned that she didn’t expect to have to come out over and over again every time she met a new person. All I can say is:
When you’re still in the closet (also, I kind of hate that term now that I’ve used it so much), the main item in your life to do list is to finally, someday, somehow, come out. Or maybe it’s just me. But looking back, I was feeling kind of tunnel vision-y. That was my focus. I was trying to figure out the right way to tell my parents, what would happen, if everything would still be okay. Thankfully, it more or less was.
But now that it’s already happened, I have a mini hurdle to jump every time I meet someone knew. Maybe I’m super lame, but a lot of the times I just choose to ignore it. I mean a lot of the time, you meet someone, and it’s just not relevant. You might never see them again, or you just don’t interact with them enough to be divulging details about your personal life. But then there’s people you see and talk to often enough that it begins to feel awkward. Then again, I tend to just be a bit awkward sometimes, so maybe I’m the only one feeling it.
I find it awkward to replace “my girlfriend” with “my roommate” or to just leave her out of the story, so sometimes I just drop it in there and see how they’ll react. Sometimes, people tell me they read my blog from Facebook, and I take that as an acknowledgement that we all know what’s going on here. But regardless, it just seems weird to me that every time I meet someone that I intend to spend a decent amount of time with, I have to tell them I’m gay and simply wait for a reaction. Isn’t that dumb?